What’s The Best Way to Get Over a Break Up?

Somerville divorce lawyers offer advice on the best way to get over a break up.Time magazine recently featured an article in their “Health” section entitled “The Best Way To Get Over a Breakup, According to Science”. http://time.com/5287211/how-to-get-over-a-breakup/ . The article focused on a study in the Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, where researchers tested three strategies to help people get over their break ups:

  • Negatively reappraise your ex – This strategy asks the person to think about the unfavorable aspects of his or her ex. The idea is that if you think about the negative aspects of your previous partner, the break up will not hurt so much.
  • Love reappraisal – Each person is told to read and believe statements that accept the situation. For example, the article cites the example “It’s okay to love someone I’m no longer with.”  By believing this statement, a person accepts his or her feelings without judgment.
  • Distraction – Using this strategy, a person is told to think about positive things that are not related to the break up or the ex partner. For example, you may think about a favorite vacation spot that has nothing to do with your ex.

The control group was not asked to think about anything in particular.

The next step in the research was to show each person a picture of their ex partner attempting to mirror a situation of a person looking at social media.  The researchers then measured the intensity of emotion each person displayed when shown the picture.  This was measured through electrodes placed on the scalp.  In addition, the persons involved in the research were given a scale and questionnaire pertaining to their responses to the pictures.

Basically, it was found that using the above strategies helped people going through a break up deal with encounters and reminders of their ex partners on social media or in real life.  Breaking up with someone you were previously in love with is difficult, and the article gives some simple strategies for making the situation a little more bearable.

At the law office of Lyons & Associates, we represent men and women throughout New Jersey who have unresolved family law matters. There is very little in life that is more personal than a break up with your spouse.  Here at Lyons, we address the whole situation and attempt to guide you through your divorce with as little angst as possible. We understand that a break up is emotionally difficult and our team offers support and guidance throughout the process. For a private consultation, contact us by e-mail or call our office at 908-575-9777.

Written By:  ChrisAnn Wright, Esq.