What Is the Best Way to Discuss Mediation with My Spouse?

If you and your spouse have decided to proceed with a divorce, mediation can be a helpful tool to sort out important issues with a skilled mediator. Mediation allows divorcing couples to bypass the added tension and cost of court proceedings. Before you can proceed with mediation, you will need to discuss the matter with your spouse to ensure that you agree about how to move forward with the divorce. When tensions are running high, it can be difficult to discuss important issues like alimony, child support, and the division of marital property. A dedicated divorce lawyer can assist you with every step of the divorce process and address all your questions and concerns about divorce mediation.

What Are the Main Benefits of Mediation?

Mediation offers a range of benefits for couples who can work together to resolve their issues. This may not be an option if you and your spouse are going through a particularly bitter and contentious divorce. However, if that is not the case, mediation offers the following benefits:

  • It is significantly less expensive than a trial.
  • It allows couples to resolve their own issues, rather than having solutions imposed upon them by a judge.
  • The mediation process is confidential. There is no public record of the discussions that take place during your sessions.
  • The process encourages you and your spouse to have productive discussions and learn communication skills that can help avoid conflicts in the future.
  • In most cases, mediation resolves all the couple’s issues, and a settlement is reached.
  • Even if you choose to pursue mediation, you can still seek legal advice from a divorce lawyer.

How Should I Broach the Subject of Mediation with My Spouse?

Even under the best of circumstances, going through a divorce can be stressful. While you and your spouse may be on the same page about wanting to avoid a contentious and costly divorce, it is important that you keep the following tips in mind as you prepare to have this discussion:

  • Decide when and where to have the conversation. Think about whether you are going to talk to your spouse in person, or if you plan to address the subject of mediation in writing. If you plan to discuss the issue in person, think about where the conversation should take place. For example, do you think it would be productive to discuss the issue at home, or would it be better to meet at a mutually agreed upon location?
  • Be prepared with a game plan for your conversation. This is an important conversation that should not be taken lightly. Consider the main issues that you want to address and have information about the mediation process available so that you and your spouse can have a productive discussion. Try to keep the conversation civil and respectful and be willing to make reasonable compromises.
  • Identify specific mediators. Provide a list of potential mediators, including contact information, his or her track record of reaching successful outcomes, and how much he or she charges for their services. This shows that you are serious about the prospect of mediation, and that you are willing to take the steps necessary to start the process.
  • Stay positive. This may be easier said than done, but it is important to maintain a positive and respectful attitude as much as possible when discussing mediation with your spouse. Do not threaten or patronize your spouse as this can derail the whole process.
  • Give valid reasons for pursuing mediation. If you feel that mediation is the best solution for your situation, be prepared to provide your spouse with a list of logical reasons and be willing to discuss each one.

Somerville Divorce Lawyers at Lyons & Associates, P.C. Assist Clients with the Mediation Process

If you have questions or concerns about how to proceed with the mediation process, you are urged to contact the experienced Somerville divorce lawyers at Lyons & Associates, P.C. at your earliest convenience. We will assist you with every step of the mediation process and secure the best possible outcome for your divorce. To schedule a free, confidential consultation, call us today at 908-575-9777 or contact us online. Located in Somerville and Morristown, we serve clients throughout Somerset, Woodbridge, Morristown, Parsippany, Rockaway, Short Hills, Chatham, Randolph, Madison, and Morris Plains.